for the glory of it all…

I tried writing something this morning, but I typed and erased, typed and erased. I’m searching to find a way to articulate everything I’m feeling, sorting my way through these mixed emotions, but there are so many places to search. Time might pass by and my hair might as well be down past my shoulders again before I have searched and sorted out every area that has been affected by this decision. 

The true purpose of all of this is to grow, and I love the freedom in knowing that if I’m the only one that understands why I have done what I’ve done then that is enough. The explanation, I owe to no one, but I want to document my journey as I deal with such a drastic change in my life. 

I took a challenge from God, inspired by a friend, to die to myself and let go of just one piece of my material world. Little did I know that something I had thought to be so insignificant, had stirred and started a lasting change, and a new outlook on life. 

All last night I went back and forth with my final decision regarding this challenge. My hair was the longest it had ever been in my life. I had been so patient to let it grow. I liked being girly; feeling pretty. I just couldn’t bring myself to cut it all off. But I thought about the experience I would have, the humility that would develop in me, the empathy for the lost and insecure of this world buried under the weight of our materialistic world view and expectations. I thought of how the roots of my confidence, security, and charisma would be exposed. The lessons that I would learn throughout this time that I could never really learned unless I looked at the world from a bald, vulnerable, and maybe even ugly state. 

The temporary loss of my hair is nothing compared to the invaluable lessons that will soon become a part of me; the lessons that will shape my world and how I see forever. 

That was just the intro and background to all of this. Today has it’s own story, but here’s a photo to tie you over – all of those who can’t believe what the heck I’ve done. But I just KNOW, it WILL be worth it.