for the glory of it all…

The house is empty and quiet. It’s taken me weeks to get used to being alone since I moved here, but I’m finding my old self surface as I begin to appreciate the solitude again — only occasionally at this point though. I really miss Matthew and my Mom. They’ve been in California for the week visiting my Mom’s best friend, and having some much needed R&R after all of the transitions that have been dumped on them recently. I’ll be glad when they finally get back. My Dad is at work most of the day, and it’s not easy being home alone with a teenager who is mad at the world.
Steph & Adam are in Chicago for a wedding and were gone last weekend as well. I’m finding that I miss then when they’re at work and out of town. That will be a sad adjustment when they leave. Fashion advice from Adam and detailed analytical conversations with Steph are what keep me sane inside my own brain these days. Well, part of what keeps me sane.

I found a church. I’m so thankful seeing as I went “church shopping” in Texas for 10 months with nothing that left me at peace. This church is a good combination of the two churches that have played an influential part in my growth as a follower of Jesus. It’s a little further than I would prefer to drive every Sunday, but the route is gorgeous, full of rolling hills and wildflowers. I’ll cross an old bridge over the river dividing two historic towns on my way every Sunday, and through tunnels of trees along winding roads. I enjoy the drive, the music, the sunshine, the heart-to-hearts with him who made all I have to admire on this journey.

I’ve been spending a good chunk of my day at Lifetime Fitness. Usually I’m gone for hours running, taking a pilates class, lifting weights, and just enjoying myself. It’s like a release. Plus, I like to joke with my family that it makes me feel social, because even though I mostly keep to myself, I’m surrounded by people. I have made a couple of “friends” from being there. There’s this old guy named Jim who’s probably in his late 40’s, he asked me to finish his workout for him one day, just as a joke, but he keeps me up-to-date on the ‘happenings’ around the gym. I taught an older man in his 50’s how to use a cardio machine that involves mostly lateral motions of the legs to simulate skating. I met a grandma who kicked my butt in the Fitness Pilates class I went to on Tuesday. It’s amazing how much balance I lack. My explanation is that it’s because I’m crooked to begin with!

A couple of weeks ago, I was at the gym late for a Saturday night work out. It was mostly empty in the area where I was, but I overheard a lady talking about the summers in Texas, and how the humidity that we had that day was nothing compared to what she’s used to. I asked her where she was from – same town – and we got to chatting. Turns out she had lived in the Fort Worth area and then moved to Kansas City, Missouri. I told her that I loved KC and wanted to go soon to visit IHOP (International House of Prayer). I asked her if she knew what that was. I should have expected this after such a “coincidental” meeting, but she had just finished an internship there. Woah. Long story short, we exchanged numbers and I met her for church the next morning. That night we went with a small group to an outdoor orchestra concert on the lake. Thousands of people were there with their blankets, picnic dinners, and families. The sun reflected off the lake behind the orchestra creating such a serene environment for those out to enjoy their Sunday evening. It was quite the introduction to my new town. After the concert we drove around the other lakes in the area, admired the old houses, and took a trip uptown to a neat little ice cream joint called Sebastian Joe’s. It was my first “social” outing in the Twin Cities and was quite the experience. I really enjoyed myself and the company.

Mike & Rachel’s wedding has come and gone. I did a lot of driving that weekend across the cities which was a much needed activity to familiarize myself with the area…and the detours. The “Up-North” saying around here is, “There’s two seasons up north, winter and construction”. I swear that the 35-W detour is from Satan. Not only that but during the weekends in the summer the DETOUR has a detour because they’re doing construction on it. It’s absolutely ridiculous, but it’s helped sharpen my sense of direction.
The wedding was incredibly beautiful. It was especially meaningful since BOTH Mike & Rachel have been influential people in my life. It was good to see the family core, Hansons, Hautamaki’s, and Lacar’s. If the opportunities were more abundant as far as careers go for me, in Marquette, I’d move back in a heartbeat. I’m sure I’ll find myself back there – for a while at least – some day.

I’m learning a lot. Mostly about letting go, patiently waiting for God to act, and miracles. I stumbled upon a chunk of Psalms that brought about a lot of clarity and understanding about two years ago or more. I found it interesting – in more ways than one – that God would bring me back there again.
Ps. 37 is the truth I’m clinging to again.

This, along with some external circumstances – actually many external circumstances – leave me hopeful and excited for the future. There are times where I’m hurt, angry, hopeless, frustrated, anxious (several different reasons and situations), but in the last couple of days I’ve been having more of an overwhelming feeling of PEACE. Everything seems MUCH LESS COMPLICATED. Simple. Carefree. Breezy. I’m so thankful for that.

I had my first day of work today. I transferred to a new Starbucks. I’ll be getting lots of hours, but it also means I’ll be working mostly mornings; mostly opens. I’m a night-owl by nature, but there’s something wonderful (I must be crazy, I know!) about being up so early when the rest of the world seems silent. I think that’s a big reason why I love staying up until the little hours of the night. Either way, it’s the same enjoyable concept. Whether it’s up late or up early, I’ll be up at the same time: when the silence is beautiful.
Unfortunately this means I’ll have to change my sleeping schedule by 12-hours. I’ll be having a major case of jet lag without the exciting travel to distract me from the negatives of that experience. In a weird way, I’m looking forward to my new schedule; new routine.

My goal was to be in bed by 7:00pm. I fell asleep watching Law & Order: SVU at 5:00p and woke up at 6:00 only to remember that I needed to put gas in the car and didn’t want to stop at 4:00am to do so. I got home and could have gone to sleep, but I couldn’t pass up the chance of enjoying the peace and quiet to actually process all that’s in my brain.

Nothing inspiring, abstract, or poetic tonight, just a good ol’ (overdue) update from my new town and my new life.

Love to you & Jesus.